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[30/1/2010] Uncharted 2


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First of all I want you to know, in no uncertain terms that this game is one of my favourite games of all time BUT Uncharted 2 does not claw its way into my current top 10 of best games ever. Now you may be thinking "Emsely that's insane I hate you." "How can it be one of your favourite games of all time but not get in to your own personal chart?

 

Good question fuck nuts - To explain this I will now review Uncharted 2 among thieves.

 

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First of all I want you to walk to the nearest window in your house - stand in front of it - and head-butt it through. If you successfully shattered the glass even if it was double glazing that was pretty neat - if you did not shatter the glass open the window and leap out of it head first on to the floor.

Because one way or another this game is gonna bust your head or knock you the fuck out - Period.

And I needed you to feel what it was like.

 

When I was a kid me and my buddy's always found a way to turn every day things into something life threatening, we used to make rope swings over gulleys of death and dare each other further till one of us would chicken out. Leaping from high places, dodging trains on the train tracks, sneaking in places we were not supposed to go only to be chased by caretakers with dogs or angry guys (who sometimes caught us) strangling us till we agreed never to go back.

 

Basically Uncharted 2 is the fantasy world you lived in when you were a kid and everything was possible with just a smidgen of imagination coupled with a stomach full of guts and an adventurous attitude. (Or mere stupidity) Only without the risk of pain and death!

 

Uncharted-2-Screenshot.jpg

 

I lost count of how many times my jaw dropped playing Uncharted 2 - this game is of epic abilities from start to finish it is the finest of roller-coaster rides, in fact its like been on a roller-coaster which never seems to go down hill but just one steeper and steeper drop like you started off at the top of the sky and dropped to earth but when you go to earth there was a hole to the core of the planet and when you got to the core you are thrown on to a F16 which flys you all the way back up again while the G-force yanks your face all the way back to the start of the ride.

 

Pure delightful fun is to be had, wherever that's leaping like a fearless psychopath over gaps which really do seem bottomless to finding little dints in the wall to shimmy across, all the climbing and leaping is flawless one button "X" is all that is required along with some nifty finger control if you fuck up and die it is normally your fault for not been careful enough or planning slightly ahead.

 

You're stood at the door of the plane and you pussy out ready to parachute - to late someone kicked you in the back and you're out also the mean bastards threw you out without a chute and you see it in the air above you, better get to it you only have a mile to drop - a constant feeling through out Uncharted 2.

 

Combat is improved from the last uncharted, although early on you still feel like they might have "got it wrong" but these early annoyances clear up as the game progresses - combat becomes fun, changing weapons and planning ahead, you get that good at dodging grenades that when one is thrown at you in tight cover you roll away then watch as the nade burns your eyebrows then emphatically re root to your cover position unfazed, as you play more, when the bad guys do show up instead of going "FFS!" You say "DIE!" And you do enjoy kicking the crap out of everyone and eventually every thing.

 

A special mention has to go to the graphics - I was that impressed with the visual whirlwind that I saw on screen I started asking "Is it even possible for human beings to make stuff like this?" What kind of creative skilled artist naughty dog has they can count me in there group of guys that worship them - in fact from now on if a games company even tried to impress me with jaw dropping visuals its got a very steep hill ahead of it to impress me.

 

Quotes from my mother

 

"Ohhh he nearly did not make that!"

 

"Ohhhh look how far he fell how awful!"

 

"He is like a monkey!"

 

"How does he hold on in the snow he would slip!"

 

My mother does not give a shit about video games but she actually sat and watched me play this. (To my annoyance)

 

Uncharted two is a delightful epic game that thrills and pleases from start to finish it assaults the senses at every turn wherever that maybe leaping around, the amazing gorgeous visuals (which will make you question how is it possible) to the semi old school but solid shooting mechanics to the old fashioned and cheesy storey.

 

Buy it - put it in - (it has to update your PS3 from the disk) - and enjoy what has to be the pinnacle of action adventure games in the history of man kind.

 

You are Indiana Jones, Jackie chan, and Clint Eastwood rolled into one.

 

Get ready for the best video game ride of your life!!!

 

Roll on uncharted 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 and so on, Naughty dog really do need praising for their work on this mere human beings make games, Naughty dog are currently one of the best developers on the planet they actually make modern day bibles - but back to the question "why does uncharted 2 not feature in your top ten games list of all time?"

 

Simples: Its not a game but a ride the only part that is a game is the shooting sections and these shooting styles have been bettered many times in many other games.

 

I baptise a new category of media: Interactive Roller-coaster ride of kick ass.

 

Emsley.

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26 Chapters of fun - the game gets better as it goes on all the way to the end, you can even use stealth attacks on enemies .

I will be starting a new game today or tomorrow, it kinda feels a little like resident evil 4 in places you begin to gauge how much you can getaway with when fighting enemies, also when you spot a "sparkle" its a treasure and you can shoot it to the ground just like in resi, I only have two gripes about the game:

 

1. When an enemy gets close to you they sometimes just "move funny" to avoid you and kill you stone dead, but this seems to be the heavy armoured guys with shotguns.

 

2. It crashed on me - seriously it just froze - I had just had a gruelling gun fight and got to the next section and it just paused and completely crashed the PS3 I had to power off to get it back on - console games are not supposed to do that. Still On restart it started at the exact same spot it crashed.

 

This game is mammoth get it as soon as you can man but dont let them sting you with a stupid price tag.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Great Game. Sat through two playthroughs of it and I'm kind of done with it for a while until I somehow forget the story. Multiplayer was decent; nothing too special. The coop missions are pretty fun though (Wish it was local though.)

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