Alpha

Dutch ovened? So many new sexual words I've learned today... even when I thought I knew it all! Dutch oven= "To flatulate in ones blanket for the sake of warming themself up."

Here's another extremely funny video clip I found on Digg with Steven Martin on the Johnny Carson Show. Steve Martin checks his answering machine messages live on the show. Watch: http://justvidclips.com/view/95/steve-mart...-johnny-carson/ Enjoy!

Hold your horses Weirdy. Sick freak! SupaSoaka: If a girl purposely farts in my presence, then I'll break up with her immediately. You make a good point and that girls shouldn't fart in bed. But remember, they are human too. dude, you need to seriously flocking relax and stop being such a god damn prude. ooh, so a girl you are into farts in front of you. Big whoop! Farting is a natural, but rather unpleasant, activity of the body, and nothing more... you should be laughing it off instead of being all stuck up and "proper" over it... Dude, you need to to a chill pill and not take every word I say literally. There was a at the end of the sentence which signifies a joking manner. No, I really wouldn't break up with a girl if she farted. But if that's what she would do 24/7 ... farting along .. then I would say she doesn't have proper etiquette and I would subsequently break up with her. That's the bottom line.

You guys got to watch this video. It's hilarious.. I especially love it when he punches the guy with the banana and it flies out of the skin and gets stuck on the window. Enjoy!

Of course. Qeef? .. looked it up. Well, that's different.

I'm not really into Gentlemen's Clubs. I've been into them maybe once or twice with some buddies. I get that uncomfortable feeling when I hear Depeche Mode playing in the background and seeing girls humping polls. Mooney made a good point .. if you can get it for free, why pay for a lap dance? It seems a bit ridiculous if you ask me.

Hold your horses Weirdy. Sick freak! SupaSoaka: If a girl purposely farts in my presence, then I'll break up with her immediately. You make a good point and that girls shouldn't fart in bed. But remember, they are human too. if u would break up for a fart what do u do when she qeefs??? Qeefs? What does that mean?

Hold your horses Weirdy. Sick freak! SupaSoaka: If a girl purposely farts in my presence, then I'll break up with her immediately. You make a good point and that girls shouldn't fart in bed. But remember, they are human too.

Sorry, we can't change that part. However, if you manage to hit a 100 posts -- there is a custom title option which you can put master above the word beginner.

Wow, this is really something: Watch it: http://www.piratr.com/action/viewvideo/137...on_Escape_Ever/ Absolutely hilarious!

Wow, what a story! The problem with arcades around me is that some do exist. However, the arcades have hardly any fighting games. They're either FPS or racing games. It's a real shame.

Is it a slimline model? How much did you pay?

Finally ... I've hit over 5,000 posts! It's a miracle that such a fabulous owner () like myself can accomplish such a feat! High Five!

Uhhhhhhhhhh... No comment.

Hey man, I dont want any trouble here. Like i said, my bro directed me to this place and i saw you guys had some good topics going on with women and stuff. My signature or whateva the hell its called represents who i am. I got so many girls under my belt these days that i can't live without them. So I guess you're a pimp? Have some respect dude and hell nah, I aint no pimp. Howeva, I do get a lot of girls, and time to time some girls get a little lonely and call me up. Thats the great thing about owning a bar in jersey. Im even taken some philosophy classes right now ... trying to get my act better together. Ya know? Well, education should always be number one. As far as the girls you got -- I think you should give tips to Fatal Rose. He desperately needs it. hey man no problem. so who is this Fatal Rose? is that an alias or some sort of innuendo you want to talk about? He is a user on 1Emulation. Here's his profile: http://www.1emulation.com/forums/index.php?showuser=2679

Hey man, I dont want any trouble here. Like i said, my bro directed me to this place and i saw you guys had some good topics going on with women and stuff. My signature or whateva the hell its called represents who i am. I got so many girls under my belt these days that i can't live without them. So I guess you're a pimp? Have some respect dude and hell nah, I aint no pimp. Howeva, I do get a lot of girls, and time to time some girls get a little lonely and call me up. Thats the great thing about owning a bar in jersey. Im even taken some philosophy classes right now ... trying to get my act better together. Ya know? Well, education should always be number one. As far as the girls you got -- I think you should give tips to Fatal Rose. He desperately needs it.

Hey man, I dont want any trouble here. Like i said, my bro directed me to this place and i saw you guys had some good topics going on with women and stuff. My signature or whateva the hell its called represents who i am. I got so many girls under my belt these days that i can't live without them. So I guess you're a pimp?

If this was 2003, I'd probably remove your signature. Other than that, welcome to 1Emulation.

Do you even know what vain means? Your avatar and signature is a dictionary example of vanity. Anyway, last night I got flocking TRASHED!! It was one of my friend's 21st b-day and she got so flocking drunk she passed out onto the pool table. While people were playing. In the parlance of internet times, it was epic lulz. But I did a very stupid thing last night and drove drunk. I made it home alright with no problems but it's always scary. I need to arrange my rides better. You my friend take things to seriously. I am just your average guy. Seriously though, a friend and I suffered pretty bad injuries from driving drunk. I still can't forgive myself for that. I would never be able to live with myself knowing that my irresponsibility killed someone. Tell us, what did you drink? Went to the club with like four friends, ran into some more friends when we got there, got pretty buzzed but not to bad. 3 Blue moons and one shot. Some older lady started dancing really hard against my friend on the dance floor, she invited us to her after party at her place when it was time to go. I was reluctant and uneasy about it but my friend was dieing to go in hopes of getting laid. We went, drove for like 20 mins following her, eventually got there. Noticed there were two strange men with her, I started to get a bad feeling about all of it. As soon as we got in we were seated and greeted warmly (a little to warmly), they kept offering us more drinks and even some food but I refused all of it. Fearing that it was all poisoned so they rape and kill us. Maybe I was being a but to paranoid. Well my friends kept drinking, my friend and the older lady really started to get touchy feely with each other, kissing was more common and before you knew it they were in her bedroom. The two guys did not really speak English very well. Luckily one of my friends (Jaime) spoke Spanish fluently. She came out of the bed room a minute or two later but my friend remained inside. I started to worry so my other friend Jason went in there to check on him to make sure he was still alive, I remained in the living room with my two other friends and two strange guys and the older chick. My friend Jason texted me saying that Colby is fine but is falling asleep and is going to stay in her room in hopes of her returning so he can have sex with her. Forgot to mention that I slipped my friend a spare condom that I always keep handy on me when I go out (never know what might happen). The two men really started acting oddly, eventually it was obvious that they were homosexuals. Things really started to get awkward. I really wanted to leave, the older lady started to get REALLY friendly with the rest of us, I was not at all interested but my friend Curtis started taking a liking to her. More time passed and before you knew it Colby and Curtis were passed out in separate rooms. Now she was coming on to my friend Jaime REALLY hard. They started salsa dancing and eventually it led to a romantic slow dance sequence. During this time they(the two strange gay dudes) kept going into the room my friend Colby was sleeping in. Waking him up and promising him that the older lady was going to go in and have sex with him. Then the dialog turned to something much more, they started asking him if he would allow them to suck his d*ck. He said "hell no thats gay!", gay dude replied with "it does not matter because a mouth is just a mouth". When I found out about this the next day I laughed. Eventually my friend started telling me quietly that he no longer wants to dance or be around this lady anymore, saying that he does not want to cheat on his girl friend after all. They kept insisting on us staying but I eventually got everyone rounded up and left, well almost all of us. My friend Curtis decided to stay and sleep over with three total strangers with two of them being homosexuals that had designs on sleeping with us. No matter what I did I could not get him to leave with us. He contacted me the next day with her in the bed next to him, he told me he will call me back when he gets home. Eventually he called, telling me she climbed into the bed with him and started to kiss his neck and lips. He said he decided against doing anything with her due to her being very drunk. When they woke up they started at it again this time both of them being fully aware of what they were doing. She whispered in his ear "can I be with you?" he told her it's up to her. She then got out of the bed and took off all her clothes and got back into the bed with him and they "went at it". Is that irritating or satisfying? Neither, it's more disturbing than anything else. I don't understand why some people will do anything possible to get laid. At that rate, you might as well pay for a hooker and have a more pleasurable experience. However, I still enjoyed reading the story. More please!

I got a nVidia 7900 GT that should suffice. The only thing that I am low on is hard drive space. 8 gigabyte?!?! It looks like I'm going to have to buy another hard drive soon. Oh yes, I also should clean out the dust in my computer. Otherwise, if I run that game -- my graphics card will definitely burn out. Sitting at idle, it's at 73 degrees celsius.

Why does that not surprise me? Oh and happy birthday Diso!

Do you even know what vain means? Your avatar and signature is a dictionary example of vanity. Anyway, last night I got flocking TRASHED!! It was one of my friend's 21st b-day and she got so flocking drunk she passed out onto the pool table. While people were playing. In the parlance of internet times, it was epic lulz. But I did a very stupid thing last night and drove drunk. I made it home alright with no problems but it's always scary. I need to arrange my rides better. Sorry, but drunk drivers are complete idiots. Therefore, you are an idiot. I'm tired of having to swerve my car to other lanes when a drunk driver can't stay in their flocking lane. Luckily, I'm pretty aware of my surroundings, therefore no accidents have ever occurred. That's the problem with night driving. Just know your limits.

I agree. I don't understand the infatuation over a spread out pussy. Without getting too detailed, I'm talking about pornified spread out. It looks pretty disgusting IMO and I have to make sure to focus above the lower torso. You got to be really flocked up to enjoy looking at it. The worst is when the entire picture is just that! Somebody slap me in the face for not completely avoiding pornography. Oh and dirty sanchez, search Wikipedia. I'm sure they have it.

Unfortunately, I know too much. Ignorance is bliss .... until it slaps you in the face.

Sure I do, but I don't fantasize on showering my counterpart with my bodily fluids. There has to be a line drawn somewhere -- otherwise you lead to rape or diabolically distasteful sexual activity. Dirty sanchez, anyone? Exactomundo.