Bush Declares war on Birds.

[Elazul Yagami]

i posted this a while back on my forum hoping someone would pick it up, but since no one did, i'm posting it here.

same rules apply.

 

Ok here's the deal, i'm sitting around with some buds at college, talking about avianflu and crap (birdflu to the commoners), and we were like "and yeah a bird takes a crap mid air and it's dropping a biological weapon"

 

and that's when it hit me.

 

birds with avian flu are birds with biological weapons.... so what if bush declares war on them?

 

i decided i'd type up a script, and let someone with good flash experience make it.

ANYONE can use this script as long as writing credits go to me and you tell me that you've used it.

 

anywho, here's the script.

 

--------------------

intro scene: birds chirping flying around peacefully.

narrator: while all you may see are innocent birds, behind them lies a sinister,sinister ordeal... they're out to get you.

*birds standing around holding anti tank guns and wearing army clothes.

 

---------

scene: date on screen (choose decent date) fades, screen fades into George bush giving a speech.

 

bush: people of the free world... too long we've been quiet... but we cannot anymore... these birds have wmd's... and they refuse to let IAEA inspectors check, in fact, they perfer to kill themselves!

bush aide whispering: sir, they don't kill themselves, they DIE from the avianflu

bush: no thanks, i don't feel thirsty.

bush aide: what are you talking about?

bush: you said evian, i said i'm not thirsty, what are you stupid?

bush aide stifles laughter.

 

bush: these renegade birds WILL be brought to justice!

 

*scene turns into birds with wings behind their backs being led into cages by armed men*

*scene turns back to bush*

 

bush: our military is MORE than equipped to handle this threat.

 

*scene goes to a solider walking, and he suddenly sees a chicken*

 

soldier : CHICKEN, EVERYBODY DOWN!

 

*soldier fires a rocket at the chicken, chicken's eyes go wide then boom.*

 

*scene goes back to bush*

 

bush: while they have advanced arial capabilities, we're still ready for them!

 

*scene turns to solider on an 80mm gun (or whatever they call those mounted anti air guns) firing at a flock of birds flying in a V formation.*

 

*scene goes to bush*

 

bush: we will root out these dens of evil.

 

*scene turns to a solider creeping next to a chicken hut thingie (what do they call them again?) and tossing a grenade inside, you hear chicken ruckus then BOOM and feathers everywhere.*

 

*scene back to bush*

bush: and their evil rulers shall not hide from us.

 

*scene turns into an owl with messy head feathers and long chin feathers, being "discovered" in a small cave, scene turns into doctors examining owl ala saddam*

 

bush: in the end, justice shall prevail...

 

*scene goes to a bunch of marines cooking a bird and eating another.*

 

*scene back to bush*

 

bush: and we SHALL NOT BE AFRAID!

 

*bird passes by overhead, poos on bush, suddenly everyone panics and starts running every which way, mass panamonium as bush is left standing on his own*

 

bush: damn, and this was a new suit too..

 

-----------------------------

 

anyway, what do you think?

i think it needs some editing, maybe a few extra ideas, but i think it would be really cool if someone made it in flash... any takers?

[Elazul Yagami]

what?

not ONE comment?

 

no hahahah?

no it's not funny it sucks?

no hey that's a good idea?

no hey you suck?!

 

NOTHING?!

[Weirdy]

It's just too long

[Elazul Yagami]

too long?

 

it's like a 30 second read fer gawd's sakes!

[Diso]

Having worked with flash myself, I know how long flash movies take especially how short the script is...It takes way longer to make the actual flash than to just write it out. I mean, it takes 8-10 hours just to do a minute flash movie and that's with premade sprites and music. Of course I do a lot of editing making sure everything is alright, but still, this script is more of a make your own art movie which would probably take much longer.

 

The idea is ok, but it will probably be like a minute and and half movie or so.

[Elazul Yagami]

well, do you know anyone that would be willing to do it?

 

 

and besides that, is it even funny?

[Weirdy]

I declare war on the world

War in outer space

I declare war in a nutshell

War all over the place

 

I declare war on every government

War against all odds

I declare war on your inner sanctum

On your blood thirsty gods

 

I declare war on the axis of morons

All out war on complacent consent

I declare war on the war against drugs

Rape and Slaughter of the innocent

 

War on big brother

Warmongers and profiteers

War on your dogma dubya

Armageddon's engineers

 

War in a heartbeat

I declare war on so-called civilization

World trade globalization

Organized desinformation

 

War on ambassadors of pretense

War on MTV and CNN

Macdonald's walt disney and bethlehem

On christina britney and eminem

 

I declare war on the world of anti-choice

On violent unilaterality

On the amassment of murderous high-tech toys

And all crimes against humanity

 

War on the moral majority

On corparate.com imperialism

On mindlessly bumbling stupidity

And police-state terrorism

 

Worldwar three - be all that you can be

 

("WWIII" by KMFDM)

Edited March 11, 2006 by Weirdy