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The Hills Have Eyes


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I saw that yesterday, and it was pretty damn good, it started out slow, but then once it got started it was hella sweet, it was one of those movies where people kept standing up and clapping during the movie at certain parts.

 

I had no idea what it was about, because ive never seen the original, but basically this family goes on vacation and there are these people who did not want to leave when the US did their nuclear bomb testing, and so there are these crazy deformed people running around that where effected by the radiation.

 

seriously though once this movie gets started, its like the second half was made by a different director, it even looks like it was shot differently. Very Rob Zombie+Tarentino-ish.

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I am starting to get pretty sick of all the remakes. Especially when it's a film I really liked, and I just know they're gonna f@*k it up.

Before you know it, they're gonna start making remakes of remakes.

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I am starting to get pretty sick of all the remakes.  Especially when it's a film I really liked, and I just know they're gonna f@*k it up. 

Before you know it, they're gonna start making remakes of remakes.

 

Yep, there are too many remakes. Yes, you are right! There are too many bad movie cliches in this one too. Ebert has a whole list of them: :naughty:

 

1. Wrong gas station:

 

the only gas station in the world is located on a desolate road in a godforsaken backwater. It is staffed by a degenerate who shuffles out in his coveralls and runs through a disgusting repertory of scratchings, spittings, chewings, twitchings and leerings, while thoughtfully shifting mucus up and down his throat.

 

2. Take fatal detour from shifty man:

 

The clean-cut heroes of the movie, be they a family on vacation, newlyweds, college students or backpackers, all have one thing in common. They believe everything this man tells them, especially when he suggests they turn left on the unpaved road for a shortcut.

 

3. Hey, let's all go our separate ways:

 

Ominous events occur. The family makes the fatal mistake of splitting up; dad walks back to the Wrong Gas Station, while the dogs bark like crazy and run away, and young Bobby chases them into the hills.

 

Then there are the other Dead Teenager Movie cliches:

 

Nobody in this movie has ever seen a Dead Teenager Movie, and so they don't know (1) you never go off alone, (2) you especially never go off alone at night, and (3) you never follow your dog when it races off barking insanely, because you have more sense than the dog. It is also possibly not a good idea to walk back to the Wrong Gas Station to get help from the degenerate who sent you on the detour in the first place.

 

My favourite paragraph is the last one:

 

We have the eaters and the eatees, and they will follow their destinies until some kind of desperate denouement, possibly followed by a final shot showing that It's Not Really Over, and there will be a "The Hills Have Eyes II." Of course, there was already "The Hills Have Eyes II" (1985), but then again there was "The Hills Have Eyes" (1977) and that didn't stop them. Maybe this will. Isn't it pretty to think so.

 

So, yes, there is already a remake of a remake; wasn't King Kong remade not once in the '70s but again?

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