Facebook the portal of the internet ...

[emsley]

Facebook the portal of the internet ...

 

If it get’s hacked, you don’t get it back.

 

I have re written a new disclaimer for one of the biggest social networking sites of our time, I think the following new disclaimer I have written is much better and fitting than its current terms of agreement policy, also it is something I have mailed to Facebook (luckily from an uncompromised email account) hoping that it fights its way through over thousands up on thousands of emails claiming they have been hacked and will luckily find its way to the managing director of the company, whereby he will be bestowed with great wisdom and see it for what it is, for which I have titled “The real disclaimer of Facebook.”

 

I will also mail the owner of the company which is actually split into four people, but because of this guys inherent flaw of pissing me off I have decided to hold him personally responsible for my currently hacked facebook account his name is Mark zuckerberg, but first please enjoy my newly written facebook disclaimer I’m hoping to travel to America soon and have my awesome passed by congress ASAP.

 

Yo broskis! This is Mark Zuckerberg! My second name has a Z in it that makes me radical! Anyway before you sign up to my creation there is a few things I want you to know. For one I fucked your grandma! LOL bitch! Na just kidding with ya! Your grandmas probably dead , anyway tool factory here is my real sign up agreement (lol my pop told me to write this because his lawyers said it’s the right thing to do but I wasn’t really paying attention I was wondering when my next Lamborghini was going to arrive! I had to put out my Joint and “get with the thinking” if I wanted to be big time.)

Facebooks terms and conditions.

 

Before agreeing please read this:

You’re a total noob – anything you say is stupid, I know how to code dam it! Broskis know bout my sick skills. You don’t even know what it means to put a colon in the wrong place in PHP! So for this I am superior you are not.

Facebook owns all your images, that’s right even those few of your kids, if I want to prawn them I can, I’m not a peado or anything but seriously any photos you post of your kids can and probably will be used in internet paedophile rings.

If your stooped enough to add a stranger then that’s your fault dumbass! I am in no way responsible for any of this shit! If the stranger stalks, kills your family or swipes a picture of you and Photoshop’s and dick on to your forehead then all I can say is LOL! You got owned! Na my pop said I can’t write that, anyway guys... Just don’t add anyone you don’t know they could be anyone!

 

If your account becomes compromised (hacked bitch) don’t come crying to me what do I care maggot? So what if a Nigerian hacker named “Bronco billy” fucked your shit up! EVERYONE KNOWS the government only care and put time in if it’s affecting tax income!! And trust me we get thousands of people everyday signing up! LOL you thought we cared. Guess again noob. So no one is gonna miss your account, only maybe your stupid friends but none of them really care either and the ones that do well they don’t.

 

When you see the Facebook logo you kind think we are a reputable company, you may even associate us with government recognised businesses etc... Don’t like I said before if its not directly effecting the government nobody cares. Uh! God my pop is so fucking annoying! Even though I’m a millionaire i still have to “keep it real” and take out the trash BRB!

Yeah anyway so the bottom (wow it got dark I must of had a few blunts outside!) line is basically we look like a nice friendly company sucking thousands of “regular” people in daily with false promises of security (like if you have an email it can get hacked so that can like lead to your Facebook account getting hammered or some shit but noobs don’t know about this shit and I’m not been a prick but I know you’re a noob.) So if your email account gets compromised.. lul

 

I think Im done here so if you agree to been owned, your family photos been seen by thousands up on thousands of people who will just abuse it if your compromised, your account probably getting jacked and us not caring then please continue to click agree (lol I wanted to change agree to Pwn3d but my pop said it was not fitting with the image) what does he know that dickless fuck! I’ve seen my mom getting hammered by two black guys... Man this family has issues, oh well another million in the bank and another blunt here I come!

 

Mark Zuckerberg is obviously unavailable for comment, but I'm sure if he read this new proposed agreement he would be against it just like im against their current agreement policy.

 

The reason I hold Zuckerberg directly responsibile for my account been compromised and not getting it back is for the following reasons:

He is a Jew. (I don’t hate Jews or have any agenda with them just this one)

He went to havard.

He is quoted on wiki for hacking in his early days. (Ie I was just a kid and now I’m an entrepreneur I don’t live that crazy life style anymore)

Anyway, Hope you enjoy and your times on facebook!

Sincerly,

Mark Zuckerbeg.

Get info on facebook and The owners and all the other asshats at the following links.

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Facebook

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Zuckerberg