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A lighthearted poem to sum up the election


makru

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Well, they made us write poems in English class recently, and being the political events addict that I am, I wrote a funny political poem. Enjoy.

 

Democratic Candidato en Staccato

By George I.

 

Once upon a time there was a boy named Bush

His Dad had an oil field

But the son was in no rush

To reach his birthright

Go to Yale and become President

Not by the popular vote

But the winner was evident

So said Judge Rehnquist

 

Lo and behold, three years passed

The country was in turmoil

War and Terror

Forget the Peace

This ain’t no Tolstoy

Going after Saddam and Bin Laden

While Kim Jong il munched his Ramen

So our great leader said WMD

And off we went

 

Reborn was Patriotism

It was the true time to feel like an American

A year from which we stood shyly

No weapon was found

Not even a missile

Or plutonium wizzle

Torches ablaze, Democrats rang

The Doorbell of the campaign house

04’ was painted on the door

And it was their time to fight for the White House

An election war

 

First there was Dean,

the left wing lefty

He was so popular

His campaign donations were hefty

And then arrived seven others

Kucinich

Who ate mucho spinach

Sharpton

Who lived in a bourgeois reverend’s apartment

Clark

Who was out of the political ball park

Gephardt

Who gave the unions their part

Graham

Who was as old as green eggs and ham

Brown

The motherly voice

That acted pro choice

Lieberman

Who needed to chill out on conservatism and get a tan

Edwards

Who just pretty please wanted to play nice

And then came the storm

One “specially interested” Senator came into the fray

John Kerry

A small time player

Who months earlier did not have a prayer

 

Meanwhile, Dean got mad

He had spent all his moneys

And the voters picked Kerry

Bye bye to the Vermont Governor’s honeys

 

Now Dean was not happy,

He became mean

Scared all the little children,

In one werewolf-like scream

And that was the end of the $40 million wonder

Dean’s reign was over

 

Kerry was on fire

Saying that the President conspired

To be AWOL from National Guard Duty

 

The White House screamed: “Liar!!”

 

And that’s how it started, the Great 04’ race

Muckraking and lobbyists

Politicians with untruthful tastes

 

And what of Edwards,

the good little boy from NC?

Well, for him it probably isn’t meant to be

Possibly VP

Or an early retiree

 

But we don’t know yet

Republican or Democrat?

The votes are not set

It is all in your hands, dear American citizen

Now is the time to decide,

And elect your President

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Well, they made us write poems in English class recently, and being the political events addict that I am, I wrote a funny political poem.  Enjoy.

 

Democratic Candidato en Staccato

By George I.

 

Once upon a time there was a boy named Bush

His Dad had an oil field

But the son was in no rush

To reach his birthright

Go to Yale and become President

Not by the popular vote

But the winner was evident

So said Judge Rehnquist

 

Lo and behold, three years passed

The country was in turmoil

War and Terror

Forget the Peace

This ain’t no Tolstoy

Going after Saddam and Bin Laden

While Kim Jong il munched his Ramen

So our great leader said WMD

And off we went

 

Reborn was Patriotism

It was the true time to feel like an American

A year from which we stood shyly

No weapon was found

Not even a missile

Or plutonium wizzle

Torches ablaze, Democrats rang

The Doorbell of the campaign house

04’ was painted on the door

And it was their time to fight for the White House

An election war

 

First there was Dean,

the left wing lefty

He was so popular

His campaign donations were hefty

And then arrived seven others

Kucinich

Who ate mucho spinach

Sharpton

Who lived in a bourgeois reverend’s apartment

Clark

Who was out of the political ball park

Gephardt

Who gave the unions their part

Graham

Who was as old as green eggs and ham

Brown

The motherly voice

That acted pro choice

Lieberman

Who needed to chill out on conservatism and get a tan

Edwards

Who just pretty please wanted to play nice

And then came the storm

One “specially interested” Senator came into the fray

John Kerry

A small time player

Who months earlier did not have a prayer

 

Meanwhile, Dean got mad

He had spent all his moneys

And the voters picked Kerry

Bye bye to the Vermont Governor’s honeys

 

Now Dean was not happy,

He became mean

Scared all the little children,

In one werewolf-like scream

And that was the end of the $40 million wonder

Dean’s reign was over

 

Kerry was on fire

Saying that the President conspired

To be AWOL from National Guard Duty

 

The White House screamed: “Liar!!”

 

And that’s how it started, the Great 04’ race

Muckraking and lobbyists

Politicians with untruthful tastes

 

And what of Edwards,

the good little boy from NC?

Well, for him it probably isn’t meant to be

Possibly VP

Or an early retiree

 

But we don’t know yet

Republican or Democrat?

The votes are not set

It is all in your hands, dear American citizen

Now is the time to decide,

And elect your President

It's about time someone with political interests speaks up! I opened a Who Would You Vote for President thread and it pretty much died. :-D

 

I too am a politics addict.

 

Nice poem though! Quite funny.

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