Mag Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 This is for yer gf or yer female friends that likes to hang in arcades, very great guide as well Due to my recent experiences/experiments with girls online and offline you can guess who I'm referring to. Yes, some of the more disgusting things DID happen in arcades! I'd like to make this longer, it can go forever! If you're a foolish feminist, you will not like this! DO Play SNK fighting games. Only play dancing/freaky ass games that require you to move and make a fool of yourself when with friends. Go to arcades that are owned by people who know and love the games, and bother to have machines fixed. Read and write FAQs, at HOME. Wear 3 layers of clothing and show no skin. Males AND some females at arcades may look at you, more than once, and not in the places you want. Be ready to inhale large amounts of second hand smoke. Using a gasmask is optional. Best to hold your breath for the full duration. Be aware that you SUCK. You're a girl remember? Visit HerV daily. Know which joystick goes with which button set. Put your money on ONE side of the machine's coinslots. Not both. Shut up and let your boyfriend play. If you're like me and he doesn't play arcade games, collar him and tie his leash to the machine so he can't get away. Go there to play games. Nothing else. Don't eat the food, look at the people, or make friends. Be prepared for ass whippings. Be prepared for ass grabbings. Have your nails cut, dumbass. I see people complaining that they couldn't do such-and-such cause of their manicure. Comb your frickin hair once in a while too. Especially when it's so big it ends up injuring your challengers. Read intelligent postings at newsgroups and mailing lists. Not at boards on the WWW. Play to have fun, not "humiliate males". Take your feminist ass elsewhere. Tell someone if they're taking up too much space, if they don't listen, then shove. Disclaimer - be trained in martial arts and self defense. Use throws cause they're not friggin cheap, scrub. Raise your eyebrow(s) if players make stupid remarks and keep retorts to yourself. Keep your eyes on the screen and put your bag/knapsack somewhere safe if possible, not on the floor. Use new tactics now and then and keep your gameplay fresh, foo. Be smoke free, it's better for your reaction time and co-ordination. DON'T Play airhockey or puzzle games. Go to multi-plex-tourist places like Playdium where they rip your sorry non-gaming ass off. Expect real competition at multi-plex-tourist places like Playdium where they rip your sorry non-gaming ass off. Bring only 2 dollars thinking it will cover 8 games to multi-plex-tourist places like Playdium where they rip your sorry non-gaming ass off. Bring guide books or FAQs with you. Overdress or underdress for the occasion. That's right, no hoochies with makeup and dress shoes nor nekkid ones either. Blur the screen with second hand smoke when you're losing. Brag about how good you are, online and offline. Expect your boyfriend to whup some guy's ass for intimidating/bothering/looking at you. Visit watered down and mainstream sites affiliated with IGN/FGO/WTF. It's where they try to be witty with remarks that anyone who doesn't know crap about what he's talking about could have said too. Mash buttons or try dialing your phone number, even if it results in a combo for some games. Check out other guys, cause most of them don't like women more than games. Besides, most guys there aren't gonna be much to look at, nor will they last more than a few months in a "relationship". Bring other girls with you, especially those who don't like arcades. They have good reasons not to! Play on machines that look or smell like someone had excreted on them, a few years ago. Give "mercy" rounds, no matter how much you want to humiliate someone. Other than when with your friends that is. Ask for "mercy" rounds and whine if/when you didn't get em. Speak to other people. They're crazy. Most probably don't speak english anyway. Don't try talking in their "native tongues" if you know it too. Pretend you don't, spy on their side comments. Then surprise their stupid asses when you greet a friend with that language. Go near any machines that are somewhat covered or out of the way. These usually are porno gamez u domb as. Watch TV shows that are about videogames. All of them suck. This especially includes: GamerZ, Game Nation and Video and Arcade Top 10. Call yourself a gamegirl/gamergirl/girlgamer if you play 1-2 games. Especially if those games aren't any complex beyond learning the alphabet. Say you look like Lara Croft when you are 5'2", overweight and wear wigs. Complain about how people with no lives go to arcades, you're one of them. Abuse mistakes in the game or do the same thing over and over. That's what ruins the reputation of other players. Last but not least, don't do drugs. A real winner doesn't do drugs! Some people say that smoking makes them play better, what kinda ignorant crap is that? You know better. Now that you've had Arcade 101 for females, you may go and play to your heart's content. Disclaimer - please flame me if you made one of the mistakes in etiquette, chances are you are who it's based on! -Rinoa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gryph Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 Hahahahaha! That's great. But I've yet to see an even semi-decent girl at an arcade, so they better wear 3 layers of clothing! "No one wants to see your fat rolls you disgusting biatch!" Hahaha, that's a great list. I should print it out and post it in my schools game room. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-VIOLENCE- Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 "No one wants to see your fat rolls you disgusting biatch!"kaka, you just go to the wrong spots dude Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gryph Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 "No one wants to see your fat rolls you disgusting biatch!"kaka, you just go to the wrong spots dude Nah man. I just LIVE in the wrong place. Can't wait to get the hell out of here. I asked the person that is incharge of the arcade and they said I couldn't post it. So sad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diso Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 Thats pretty specific lol..coming from a guy that had a gf that liked VGs. Most girls i see play DDR or mash buttons...or their BF just joke and pick zangchief or something like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wizard Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 Word Disoblige. NO real skill what so ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ugenn Posted March 12, 2004 Share Posted March 12, 2004 Arcades are a good place to access a girl's skill in handling a joystick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr.X Posted March 12, 2004 Share Posted March 12, 2004 Only play dancing/freaky ass games that require you to move and make a fool of yourself when with friends. This sentence is very weird. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agozer Posted March 12, 2004 Share Posted March 12, 2004 Arcades are a good place to access a girl's skill in handling a joystick. O_o There just has to be a hidden meaning in that... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaioshade Posted March 12, 2004 Share Posted March 12, 2004 my gf goes to the arcades with me all the time. and she is pretty good too. she can beat the average player. not quite ready for high level comp though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shibathedog Posted March 12, 2004 Share Posted March 12, 2004 ROFL thats SO true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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